081 - How Are You Handling Your Midlife Crisis? Finding Peace in Your Storm (Kanye vs. Brené)

Greetings, Bettys and Jacks! Alexis starts us off today with a story about her closing performance of Seussical (Mic drop! Literally!). It wasn’t a “major wedgie,” but it was definitely a Circus McGerkus. Even though Lexy is the comic relief, the fact that she kept her cool, enlisted her friends to help, and finished the show tells you a lot about the kind of person she is. 

 

Mary started researching (and listening to a little bit of) Kanye West. He’s a controversial rapper/singer/producer/fashion designer/presidential candidate . . . now divorced from Kim Kardashian. Lexy was a Kanye fan in high school (she likes the Donda album–listen here), but Mary hasn’t really given him a chance until now. Listen to the clean version of “Jesus Walks” here on Spotify.

 

We all need to find peace in the storm. Everyone is going through something hard; so how are you handling it? Kanye’s fame and notoriety made it so that he was scrutinized for everything. He has had a difficult time accepting certain outcomes, and for him, it all kinda came to a head in 2016 (interestingly at age 39), when after some irresponsible and erratic behavior, he was admitted for psychiatric observation at UCLA. Kanye has not wanted to accept a diagnosis of Bipolar Disorder, but (to us) it seems pretty evident that he has some mental health issues.

 

Kanye is in the middle of his storm, which is unfortunately being played out very publicly. Mary was listening to a podcast episode of Elevation from March 19, 2023. This incredible episode features Pastor Rich Wilkerson (who married Kim and Kanye), who talks about the storm having its purpose. LIsten here on Apple or here on Spotify. Every story has a storm, and the “storms create the perfect stage for an audacious response.”

 

We love Brené Brown’s The Gifts of Imperfection, and her incredible TED Talk on the Power of Vulnerability, both of which happened in 2010 (when she was age 41). It’s right around this age where we all have to decide HOW we are going to get through this storm of midlife, and what we’re going to do. Just like our physical vision starts to change at midlife, everyone’s prescription is different, and we all respond to our storms and these changes differently. 

 

Here are Mary’s takeaways from this case study of Kanye vs. Brené (with lots of inspiration from the “Gifts of Imperfection”):

1. Recognize and accept what is happening
2. Let go of who you think you’re supposed to be. “Happiness equals reality minus expectations” (from “Engineering Happiness” by Rakesh Sarin and Manel Baucells). This takes a LOT of thought work.
3. Embrace who YOU are. Use the “slash effect” to help you figure out what makes you come alive.

Our Better Betty Challenge for today is to read “The Gifts of Imperfection.” Please read the book (purchase it here on Amazon), especially Guidepost #9 about Meaningful Work). Even if you’re not in midlife or in crisis, if you let it, this book will truly change your life.

 

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Thank you for listening, friends. Betty. Remember: you get to choose how you handle your own crises. Life is hard, and midlife is incredibly complicated, but there are so many beautiful things to come, and so many incredible things you can do and see and create. We’re so grateful for you, and we love you more.